Finally Understand (how a cult works) now!!!!
If you live in Massachusetts, please listen to my words. If you EVER see a bumper sticker saying “finallyunderstandnow.com”, do NOT go to the website. And if you do, please do not be enough of a fucking moron to go to one of their “workshops”. This is ALL of the makings of a fucking cult. Look at this bullshit:
“There is so much love in your heart that you could heal the entire planet. But just for now, let us use this love to heal you!”
Another thing, look at the name. Finally Understand Now. F.U.N. Only a fucking cult would choose a name like F.U.N. Assholes.
So check this:
“Love in your heart” is the same as a “Spiritual energy that you can share with others”. Basically, it’s something made up that makes you believe in the bullshit they feed you, basically something to hook you into the cult.
“Heal” is another term for “cleanse” or “purify”, which in the end translates to “poison the punch and drink it with a smile so the aliens can take you to Keron 5″.
“Heal the entire planet” which means RITUALISTIC GENOCIDE
“One heart at a time” which means….well, more suicide.
“Transformed the lives of thousands of people worldwide”, which just means it has sucked in enough sad pathetic assholes to spread the love.
“The only thing that stays the same, is that everything is always changing”. Not only is this the worst use of “Tom Sawyer” by Rush I have ever seen in my life, but it’s clearly the biggest possible hint towards this organization being a cult without them saying “hey we’re a fucking cult”.
But, i think the biggest possible bit of proof that this is some rediculous cult is this entire page found on the site:
“What is Reiki??The word Reiki is made up of two Japanese words, Rei which means ‘Universal’ and Ki which means ‘life force energy’.
Reiki restores energy balance and vitality by relieving the physical and emotional effects of unreleased stress. It gently and effectively opens blocked meridians and chakras, leaving one feeling relaxed and at peace.
Reiki affects a person’s body, mind, spirit, and emotions. Reiki is a simple, natural and safe method of spiritual healing, and self-improvement. Reiki is not a religion, it is a stress reduction, relaxation, and healing method anyone can use or learn.
Reiki is powerful, yet wonderfully gentle and nurturing.
During a session the client remains fully clothed while lying on a Reiki table covered with a light blanket or sheet. Reiki is an effective alternative, or complement to, massage therapy. Reiki supports any medical or supplemental healing methods a client may be using and is of growing interest to Chiropractors, Medical Doctors, Psycho-therapists, Psychologists, Hypno-Therapists etc.
Anyone can tap into the unlimited supply of “life force energy” to improve their health, or enhance their quality of life by learning and being attuned to Reiki. Or by receiving it from a Reiki Practitioner or Reiki Master.”
Are you fucking serious? Reiki is MADE UP. There is not a fucking “universal life force” which can be used to heal by rubbing people. It is just a cultist excuse to grab some tits and dick. And if you go to the page, they show a picture of a dog getting rubbed on the head and stomach, and through the outstanding power of reiki, it lays down and feels relaxed. Do me a favor. Pet your dog. You just became a reiki expert. Congarts, asshat. How the FUCK do you get certified in reiki? Where do you go? What school do you go to for that kind of education.
Actually, you know what. Since you’re probably an idiot, go ahead and join. I hope you make it to Keron 5, douchebag.
